Have you ever felt like giving up on your goals because you felt unworthy?
With lofty goals, sometimes comes very difficult challenges, especially in the case of never having dealt with the things of the past (reasons for feeling unworthy). Challenges with motivation, positivity, and follow through, are some of the main symptoms of this tricky mental state. Some of the questions you should ask yourself are: Is this goal really for me? Is this something that I’m truly passionate about? Is there something deep rooted within me, that dampens my motivation? Am I feeling unworthy of success, due to some past experiences I haven’t dealt with?
Sometimes goals are just difficult, whether we’re aligned with our purpose, and dealing with our past or not. However, with aligning with your purpose, and passion, you’ll find that it is much easier to push through those tough challenges. If you do have things to deal with regarding your past, then this’ll be the first place to start, so that you’ll have a chance to experience lasting peace and happiness for the rest of your life. In my experience, and the experience of the hundreds of people I’ve discussed this topic with over the years; this is an absolute truth, that our past issues cannot just be stuffed down and forgotten; they must be dealt with head on, no matter what steps you need to take to achieve that peace. This can mean having to forgive a perpetrator, or even to forgive ourselves as well. Or to seek the forgiveness of others, if the things you hold onto are because of actions you took towards others. Everyone is worth giving a second chance, so find the courage to face your past and resolve it as much as possible, so as to release any negative blocks for your own personal motivation.
The building of negative habits
One of the things that can happen with past negative experiences (abuse, neglect, bullying, trauma etc.) … is the building of negative habits. This is where we can sometimes allow the things of life to get in our way or discourage us, because of how we feel our lives have been going. Some negative habit examples, can be with not attending to our health (exercising, eating well, taking time for yourself etc.), not spending time socializing, or with working too much (workaholic). Other deeper issues like drug addiction, sex addiction, food addiction (eating disorders in general) etc., can all have significant impacts on our ability to follow through on our goals.
There are very important principles, that we have to remember, when it comes to staying motivated, and feeling good about the work we’ve set before us. First of course… is to align with our purpose, but equally as important are the things we let hold us back because of our negative thoughts and habits. Many of us in the spiritual world (or of the spiritual mindset), have been working very hard on eliminating our negative habits, influences and behaviors from our lives, but there should never be an expectation of perfection. Perfectionism can also be another form of negative habit, as it can drain as much positivity out of you as doing nothing does. Balance is the key when it comes to your life’s success with attaining happiness.
This process of change, can include modifying or changing the kinds of people we surround ourselves with, the environments we allow ourselves to be a part of, and all of the life choices that may lead to negative influences. Just because we work hard at eliminating those things, doesn’t mean we aren’t allowed to ever slip up. It’s not how many times you get knocked down, but how many times you stand back up and fight. Do you want to be the kind of person who gives up, or someone who’ll never give up no matter what challenges are set before you? You get to decide what kind of life you want, and this has more to do with your own intention to solve the problems of your life, or to continue to be a victim of your past experiences, and ultimately defeated by it. Read the power of intention by Dr. Wayne Dyer, this will open your eyes to the amazing power we all hold, to solve the issues in our life through our own intentions.
The importance of looking within
Many of my other articles, also talk about the importance of looking within, and learning how to forgive yourself, and others. This idea is not something new, and there are very many books written on the subject. Basically, my thoughts on this topic have come about not as part of reading books necessarily, but through my own personal experiences and observations. I’ve learned, that it’s very important to allow yourself to be an imperfect human being, even though we are striving towards the best version of ourselves. Just because you have this lofty goal of seeming perfection, doesn’t mean we should get caught up in expecting actual perfection of ourselves. What taking time to look within, and really allowing yourself to feel and heal your past does for you… is truly something amazing and powerful. When we heal the things of the past, we can create vast potential for our own future, which helps to create vast amounts of energy, new-found motivation, and much better dynamic in all of your relationships. Coming to terms with the past is a very important step in not just following through on your goals, but also with being able to feel positive, confident and motivated in your life.
Coming to terms with your past is a journey, not a destination
What I mean by that, is you may think you’ve settled the past 100%, but you may actually still feel the effects of the past for your entire life to some extent. It’s more about how we deal with the emotion and thoughts that can still come up from time to time, and then building new habits of thought. We need to constantly remind ourselves, that those things of the past are in the past, and we don’t have to own them anymore. Nothing about your past no matter how difficult it was, has to hold you back from doing what’s in your heart. So, to bring things back to the negative patterns we form sometimes; we have to understand that many times, these patterns were formed as a way to escape the pain we felt in the past. Those vices, or negative patterns served a purpose for a time to allow us to cope, but many of those patterns or not good for us long term. They are not good…. for not just the body, but the mind-body-spirit complex as a whole. If you’re out of alignment on any of those three areas, you’ll absolutely have issues in the other areas as well. No single human being is ever perfectly balancing their entire complex, but if we pay attention, we can get pretty good at keeping a healthy balance.
One of the main goals is
One of the main goals in dealing with your past, is to remember that if you slip up and fall back into old patterns because of stress, and then falling off the wagon temporarily, that you don’t have to beat yourself up over it. You don’t have to think that all the good work you’ve done to this point is now negated in its entirety. The very fact that you’re having this struggle with guilt… should tell you that you are still very passionate about achieving your main goal, and the goal of dealing with your past. None of us is perfect, but your intention to do good is the most important value to hold.
This is one of the most overlooked, and under discussed issues leading to the lack of motivation to achieve your goals. This is usually something that happens in privacy, and therefore never spoken about, unless it gets out of hand. Don’t let your vices hold you back, or be used as an excuse to fail to meet your goals, and achieve your success. Know that you are just as worthy as the next person of success, and that earning and thriving are a god given right, and not a right handed out by society.
The universe sets the rules not society
Through the law of Karma, and the Law of attraction, we are constantly manifesting things positive or negative into our lives, by our own free will. Every thought you hold, every action you take or don’t take, helps to define your potential future! Think for a moment about the decision to get married, the decision to have children, or the decision to change jobs etc. Each of those decisions sets you on an entirely different path than you’d been on previously. It’s not just the decision by itself, but the details such as “is this the right person for me to marry?”, “do I really want to have children at this time?”, “am I really interested in the job I’m applying for beyond the money it will produce?”. Each decision we make has a huge impact on our lives, and for the rest of our lives.
See the article on this blog called “Waiting on The Path”, for more details on the importance of stopping for a moment when you are at a cross road in your life.
So, in closing, you can see yet again, another case where not looking within, and dealing with your past can hold you back from achieving the success and happiness you want in your life. We all have a choice to continue to put our head in the sand, rather than deal with the issues head on and heads up. What are you going to choose success or failure?
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