Write your own Obituary before you die?
Now you may be saying to yourself, “This is so morbid to suggest”, or “Why in the heck would I want to do that”? I mean after all, aren’t we supposed to just live in the moment, and not care about the end days, as if they would never come? Or aren’t we supposed to live, laugh and love as if it was our last day?
The point of this exercise is to do just that, to see ourselves, in this moment as we feel we are right now, and to reflect on or past, and our accomplishments as well. When we get to the ends of our lives, someone who loves us usually ends up doing this for us. There have been so many times, that I’ve learned things about a person, that I never even knew about them, and wished I could have asked them about those experiences before they died. I also wonder if they know how much others will wonder about their unspoken contributions.
The things we carry with us
There are things we all carry with us, that might be good for the world to know, or to express. Sometimes, we go through this life, not really thinking about our past, or where we’re headed, or the real reason for being alive in the first place. I truly believe, that we all have a story, and we all have a past, and sometimes there are things left unsaid because we didn’t think it was important to anyone including ourselves. Some of us think to tell our story, would be boring – but you know, it always seems that when someone else is writing the story of our lives, that it can be very different story from what we feel about ourselves, or would express in that way. However, even if we don’t care much about what other people think, there is often an impact that we have on those around us (good or bad), that can be very valuable in our learning process here in this 3d realm.
Getting a different perspective
So, knowing this to be true, that people all have a different perspective, and those that love us the most, usually have the most accurate vision of who we are at our best, we could then take this even a bit further, and ask that the person, or persons who would most likely write your obituary, do their own version as well. This would of course be a bit scary, but I feel it could be a very important exercise in enlightenment about who we really are. Part of knowing yourself, is with knowing who you are in the eyes of those that love you the most. Why wait until you are in heaven to get an idea of where you are in this moment, right now. Yes, were all going to heaven doubting Thomas! We can talk more about that in another article.
Some of the things you can obviously address, are questions like: “Am I really living up to my true potential?”, “Am I really a happy person?”, “What does it mean to be happy?”, “What were the ways in which I gave back in life?”. Did you lead a life of service to self or service to others, or a good balance of both? Living a life of balance is hard at times, but is essential for our own happiness. In other words, if all you do is help others, and never help yourself, then you are off-balance in your life and your energies, and conversely, service to self in all cases, with no consideration of the effects we have on others, is also living out of balance, and can never bring true happiness.
Time spent in reflection is very important
The more time we spend in reflection, the more we can realize what kind of balance we have in our lives. Were you always saying “when I reach this goal, then I will be happy”, or “when I get this degree, I will really be happy”, or “when I get this house, or car I will really be happy?” We all fall into the trap of the so called social norms, and reaching for the American dream. If the focus is solely on things, and never on love of self and others, then no matter the empire we build, we can never find true peace and happiness. Peace and happiness, is found within, and unless we eventually decide to do that work, and make it a lifestyle change for the rest of our lives, then even if you do reach some enlightenment, you will lose the happiness as soon as you stop searching, stop growing mind, body and spirit.
Yoga and meditation is one major way to go within, and to force yourself to face up to the fact that we are all spiritual beings, having a physical experience, and not the other way around. We were in spirit first, and then came into this life with purpose, and goals to accomplish for our own learning and our own spiritual enlightenment. I think if we all think about it, we know when we are on the path to accomplishing our goals, and when we have given up on them for a period of time. I think even if we are not thinking consciously about our goals, the divine has a way of putting people and situations in our lives, that force us to go in the right direction, or suffer the consequences of repeating the same mistakes over and over again. It is not until we face our truth, that we get out of the wheel of Karma, and can rest our souls.
This exercise is not to place judgement on ourselves
So, the main point of this exercise, is not to place judgement, but for a time look at yourself in a positive light, and build on those areas. If you have a real hard time thinking of positive things to write, then it is obvious that there are things that you will want to work on. There is nothing wrong with discovery, and feelings that might be less than ideal. The point is if you go within long enough to release those things that bind you to a rigid thinking process, or to even unrealistic expectations of ourselves, then you can begin to heal those things that hold you back from being the best version of yourself.
One of the main things here, is that you are focusing on you, and you only, and you have to do this without comparison to others, or thinking about what anyone else thinks, except those people who love you enough to want to go through this exercise with you. If you don’t have those kinds of people in your life, then you will have to rely on your own personal reflections. This can be very difficult to do for those that find themselves somewhat isolated from friends and family. Often times, this comes from a devaluation of our own selves through some experience that happened in the past, or through some kind of abuse, that we allow to continue in our own minds, and with our own inner voices.
Pay attention to your inner voice
It is very important for each and every one of us, to pay attention to our inner voice, and the stories we tell ourselves, or the words we use in private. Sometimes we think we are okay with some bad habits relative to self-deprecation, and negativity, but those are the things we have to be working towards eliminating from our lives, no matter where we find ourselves in life. You have to know that no matter what… your life has purpose, and that if you can begin to love yourself for where you are right now, with what you write on that piece of paper today, then you are already on the road to turning things around. That’s not to say, that you go around being negative about being negative, keeping yourself in an infinite loop of guilt, and feeling inadequate or a failure if you have some difficulty with the process.
Failure is progress
It’s perfectly okay to fail, but not okay to just give up on yourself, we all know that’s not the answer if we are listening to our hearts truthfully. What I mean by that… is that we should try to realize the power we have with self-love, and forgiveness of self and others, as well as intention and motivation. One important factor, is with dealing with the ego in a way that frees us from the expectation of others, and the expectations of society, and the expectation of anything external. It is only in the expectation of our souls; what we feel in our hearts, that will bring us true happiness, and purpose in life. If we only do things to seek the approval of others, rather than to serve ourselves and others positively, then we will be missing the point of life entirely. I always have to remind myself, that in order to be happy, I have to find ways to be in service to others, more so even than in service to myself. Even with this website project, it has been a challenge to keep this exclusively in balance, and more focused on serving others.
Our main purpose for this website
Our main goal in creating this website, is to allow people to share their ideas, their successes, failures, triumphs, moments of despair, and enlightenment, and to share my own personal journey and struggles as well, In the hopes of saving others from giving up in difficult situations, or to give up on the idea of their own personal power through spiritual enlightenment. I’ve created this website, so that there’s a safe and secure place, where you can share those inner most feelings, without feeling like a target of bullying, or abuse, and without having to be identified in your sharing if you don’t want to be (like with other social media websites). Over time, this website will produce some of the greatest sharing of personally enlightening materials, because it’s coming from “real people like you”, who just want to seek a better way for their lives, their souls, and their happiness. This site is not just for the spiritually gifted, and is for everyone to benefit from the sharing of spiritual, social, psychological, philosophical ideas, and concepts.
Back to the challenge
Getting back to the topic at hand however, looking back on our accomplishments, and writing about how we feel others might have viewed our lives, and comparing that to what those who will likely write our obituary for us, will definitely be an exercise in enlightenment, and will hopefully show that you have a lot of things to both be thankful for, and things to work towards, and that no matter what is written, we are all here to accomplish something.
So, after doing this exercise, you’ll then see more clearly where you really are, and where you want to go from here. What is it that you would regret on your last days, if you’ve never gotten up the courage to explore your options in life. I know it seems low vibration to think about our own death, but like it or not, this will all come for each and every one of us, and it is paramount that we start to focus on what we want out of life for ourselves, and not just for those we serve. Is your life in balance, or do you need a big change? Are there ways in which you would like to give back, with fighting pollution, taking care of your environment, your community, your neighbors? Have you ever had a chance to think about those kinds of things?
We sometimes feel like slaves to our lives, but we always have choices
Some of us feel like slaves to our careers because of what they have to support financially, such as a big home, expensive cars, cloths, vacations, food etc. Sometimes we have to take a deep look at our lives, and really see it in high definition, and with an honest and open heart. Are there ways in which you can scale back your life, and your possessions, so that you have extra money to travel, to experience life, or to volunteer some of your time, or are you forever bound to the idea of being stuck, and unwilling to take risks? Personally, I would rather die, than to never have taken a risk to try to “live my life outside the box.” Living life outside the box; outside of our comfort zone, is the only place where new and amazing things can happen.
You can always get things back, but you can never get one more minute of your life back spent unhappy! It all starts with a thought, and an intention to make a change. That doesn’t always mean you jump to quitting your job overnight, and starting over without some kind of plan, but it does mean you start with an intention for change, listen to your inner voice (the one in your heart, not your head), and then begin to take good feeling steps in the direction of your purpose, letting spirit guide you as well through meditation and prayer. We cannot stay on our knees forever however, as we have to follow it up with motivation and action once we get the direction and desire within our hearts.
We’ll that is all I can write for this evening on this topic, but if you are brave enough to take this challenge, then I feel it may actually really help you to connect with not only yourself more, but with those that love you the most.
Have an amazing weekend!